Norah & Paul: Seeing My Best Self

This is my niece Norah and nephew Paul:

Paul is 18 months old and Norah is four. She's FOUR. Notice she's got a swim cap on. That's because she's getting ready to swim in a competitive meet in the eight and under division. She's swimming the 25-yard freestyle and the 25-yard backstroke.

Yes. BACKSTROKE.

Am I the only person who doesn't have kids who's amazed by this? I could barely put my face in the water at 4--hell, I'm not even sure about that because I don't remember anything before I was 5. And this kid is doing the BACKSTROKE.

What amazes me more is how she learned it. The meet was on a Wednesday. She got to the pool on Monday and said, "I wanna do the backstroke." And so she did. She swam the length of the pool and so her coaches put her in the meet with kids TWICE HER AGE.

(sorry about the caps, but this whole story astounds me.)

I feel so blessed that I live close enough to my brother to watch these small folk grow up. There's this fearlessness to Norah that I just adore. She says what's on her mind, and if you're not paying attention to her, shouts, "Guys. GUYS!" I love watching her little legs run, which she loves to do as much as she can, laughing the whole way.

I just ran today and believe me, I was not laughing.

Paul shows no fear either. One of the games that we play is that I hold him in my arms and slowly bend over, so that he's hanging upside down. He laughs and laughs and then eventually starts to throws himself back, simply trusting that I will still be holding on.

I get a little sad because I know someday they'll lose that sense of fearlessness and freedom, that things will always go their way because they want it to be so. On the other hand, I get inspired: why shouldn't I be able to "learn the backstroke" because I want to and then just do it? Why can't I trust if I throw myself backwards, there will be someone there to catch me?

Because it's true, you know. It is. Trust me. I can do whatever I want, and if I take a risk, someone will be there no matter what. There's too many stories outside the story of my life that prove this theory.

There really is a lot we can learn by watching kids. We see ourselves in them. We see our best selves. If you're like me, you get all warm and gushy inside just thinking about it.

And if you want to see great form, just look at Norah showing her stuff, coming in third (i.e. NOT LAST) in her heat:

Not the Top Ten Reasons for Anything

Scott Rosenberg wrote an interesting piece in Salon called How Blogs Changed Everything, and this particular passage gave me pause:

...of all the species of writer, bloggers are the least insulated from their audience, most vulnerable to the ebb and flow of attention and response. They are both alone and in a crowd. Their solitude can inspire self-indulgent ranting; their sociability can tempt them into self-serving pandering. But every now and then they manage to hold their balance in this paradoxical position for an extended, exhilarating spell.

I can dig that.

This blog is my cybersoap box, my little piece of cyber Speaker's Corner, if you will.

I write these days to get out what's in my head, whether it's wishing I had arms like Linda Hamilton, or missing a friend, or buying a cherry tomato plant at the Reston Farmer's Market.

Purely selfish reasons.

I sit here in my nightie, on my bed, writing, when I really should be sleeping, and I forget that once I hit the "Publish" button, a bajillion people could see this (even though it's really only three).

Is this self-indulgent ranting or self-serving pandering? Perhaps, but I am trying for the extended exhilerating spell--really, I am. Because what it all comes down to is this: I can talk to my cats (and don't think I don't), talk to myself (and don't think I don't) about what's running through my mind at any given moment. Or I can share my thoughts with folks who, while they don't see me everyday, or look deep into my eyes and say "I love you," seem to care that I have something to say. And I DO have something to say. It might not be the top ten ways to make your life more interesting and meaningful, or five reasons girls like to kiss more than boys, or whatever lists folks are conjuring up elsewhere, but once in awhile, my scribblings might be read by whomever and mean SOMETHING.

Do you have something to say? Well, I'll listen, I'll read--whatever. I'll get off my soapbox and help you up. There's room for you. There's room for everyone.

Photos:
UK - London - Knightsbridge: Hyde Park - Speaker's Corner

Cherry Tomatoes in June I